Re: VMS opportunities HP misses every day

From: Andy Bustamante (a_c_bustamante_at_earthlink.net)
Date: 05/03/04 

Date: Mon, 03 May 2004 18:51:36 GMT

One more ad:

Monday morning, generic office building lobby, a modest line at the coffee
stand

Elevator opens and red eyed IT actor stumbles to the line. "What a weekend,
I've been here since Friday night trying to the new worm out of our
network."

Coworker: "I've been here since Thursday morning trying to restore the
e-mail backups on the third floor"

"Double expresso"

"Wake up blaster with a double shot of espresso"

Third player walks in from the main door and they ask "How was your
weekend?"

"My daughter's team made the soccer finals and I took the family to the
movies on Sunday"

"Didn't you have the big operating system upgrade?"

"The VMS upgrade? I did that too. I'm on my way to airport to upgrade the
remote site tonight, management feels better if I go there. Oh a de caffe
please.. ." 

-- 
Andy Bustamante
Remove the ASCII 95s for e-mail
"Paul Sture" <nospam@sture.homeip.net> wrote in message
news:c722hc$hdhu4$1@ID-132135.news.uni-berlin.de...
> John Smith wrote:
>
> <snip for brevity>
>
> >
> > <TV ad>
> >
> > Multiple tekkie types going nuts downloading and patching server after
> > server.
> >
> > Big Boss talking to IT head: "This is crazy. It's costing us a fortune
> > having all these people patching everything all there time. Our server
> > infrastructure is killing our business. I don't care what it takes, fix
it
> > now!!!"
> >
> > 2 weeks later....
> >
> > Big Boss walks into glass house. Server farm is gone. One rack standing.
A
> > few tech guys playing frisbie in the empty space in the glass house
> >
> > Big Boss to IT head: "What's going on? Microsoft fix up it's act, huh?"
> >
> > IT head: "Actually no. We fixed our server infrastructure permanently.
> > Reliability is way up, patches are non-existent; viruses & worms are a
thing
> > of the past. We laid off 50% of our staff. All of our web and mail
servers
> > have been switched over to OpenVMS from HP. All our file servers too.
Piece
> > of cake."
> >
> > Big Boss: "Great work, Griswold. You can expect a big bonus this year."
> >
> > Voiceover: "OpenVMS from HP has been providing enterprise-class
security,
> > throughput, and reliability for the world's largest corporations for
over 25
> > years. Now available at a price every company can afford.
> >
> > Call 1-800-OPENVMS or visit us online at www.hp.com/openvms
> > (also www.hp.com/reliability , www.hp.com/security , www.hp.com/24x7 )
> >
> > </TV ad>
> > (c) 2004, John Smith. All Rights Reserved.
> >
> >
> >
> > <TV ad>
>
> Here's some raw material for your imagination to work with John.
>
> And to lend it all some official credibility, "As Per Recommendation of
> Her Majesty's Secret Services, MI5"
>
> http://www.mi5.gov.uk/output/Page55.html
>
> "ELECTRONIC ATTACK
>
> ...
> Malicious software
>
> The techniques and effects of malicious software (e.g. viruses, worms,
> Trojans) are as variable as they are widely known.  The growing use of
> email, of interconnectivity between systems, of external contractors and
> of remote access (i.e. for home-working) mean that virus infections
> spread ever more widely and rapidly.  Most dangerous are those concealed
> in legitimate software or inserted into systems during production.
>
> <Not a problem if you have VMS. James Bond references as appropriate>
>
> Malicious modification of hardware
>
> Computer hardware can be modified so as to mount or permit an attack.
> This is normally done at the point of manufacture or supply prior to
> installation, though it could also be done during maintenance visits.
> The purpose of such modifications would be to allow a subsequent attack
> to be made, possibly by remote activation.  The level and sophistication
> of the attack would depend partly on the location of manufacture and
> supply; the threat is greater from those systems made, supplied from, or
> maintained from overseas.
>
>
> <All the more reason to pick a supplier who has a longstanding track
> record of rigorous testing before products are released>
>
> <Ed: Ooh, can we say offshoring? ;-)>
> ...
>
> WHAT YOU CAN DO
>
> Each attack is particular.  Therefore advance advice is necessarily
> general and procedural.
>
>      * Acquire your systems from reputable manufacturers and suppliers.
>        Cheaper options may be expensive in the long run.
>
> ...etc."
>

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